Yeah, yeah. Whatever.

I don’t watch football. We’re not a football family. The DNPH sat down with Monkey Boy a couple of weekends ago to watch one of the playoff games, but that’s the extent of our football watching thus far this year. Except we always watch the Superbowl.

Personally, I find the game to be “that thing that happens between the commercials and the half-time show.” I’m not a huge WHO fan, but I’m not inherently opposed to them. Old rockers are still good rockers.

So yesterday I stocked up on the necessaries. I bought things that I haven’t bought in years. Like Velveeta. I bought a small block of Velveeta cheese yesterday. This ‘pasteurized processed cheese product’ says it will expire this June. I think we all know better than that. When the nukes finally get us, or Chthulu descends, the only things left on this earth will be the cockroaches nibbling their way through shiny orange Velveeta.

That said, nothing is guaranteed to evoke memory like Velveeta melted with a can of Ro-Tel. It’s like high school football games all over again with me freezing my butt off in my marching band uniform, waiting in the stands to play, then huddling with my friends to stay warm. In other words, it’s just not football without Velveeta and Ro-Tel.

I got other stuff to make the good kind of nachos, with the ground beef and refried beans and salsa, too. Bye-bye diet! At least for tomorrow!

So what are y’all nibbling on tomorrow during the big game?

And maybe I should know this, but…who’s playing?

The weekend actually turned out pretty well.

Oliver did have surgery on Friday. He’s always had a sensitive stomach and when he feels icky, he eats grass to try to make himself throw up. It turns out that he ate so much grass, though, that some of it wove itself together into a mass in his stomach that blocked everything from moving on. Over half a pound of grass. My dog thinks he’s a cow. The vet said it’s only the second time she’s seen that in 26 years.

He’s recovering very well. Has staples rather than stitches, but he can’t get to them to lick or pull them out because they’re so high on his belly. Yay!

The Pinewood Derby turned out great, too! DS won 2nd place in Best Concept Car! He didn’t win any of the races, but he’s been carrying that trophy with him since he won it. Seriously. He takes it downstairs to watch TV, he brings it to the dinner table, he takes it to his room with him to sleep.

Sunday, we were huge layabouts. I read 5 books. It was awesome. We had Moroccan Meatballs in Tomato Sauce with Poached Eggs for dinner. Last night was a crockpot Italian Sausage Stew.

And for more great news, I lost 2 lbs! I don’t like that I have to do Slimfast to do it, but it’s working. Yay!

DH — What do you mean you didn’t glue the stars on Monkey Boy’s Pinewood Derby car?!? By the way, I’ll be home late and probably won’t be able to help set up the Derby at the school gym. (Not his fault — he’s been working 14 hour days for the last two weeks.)

DS — Yay Pinewood Derby! No clue what I’m doing! Also, please tell me a fourth time to do my homework because I love it when you totally lose your cool and shriek like that.

DD — I also love being repeatedly screamed at to do my homework. Because I didn’t hear you the first three times when you asked me reasonably and politely and treated me like a real, functioning human being. Nope. The screaming works for me. Also, I’m failing Geography.

Dog — Hi Mom! Love you, Mom! Sorry I puked on your floor, Mom! *hlrup* Sorry I puked on your floor AGAIN, Mom! Please take me to the vet so I can have surgery to remove the thing that I ate that I wasn’t supposed to eat that’s now blocking up my insides and making me *hlrup* Sorry I puked on your floor, Mom!

Then they all looked at me like they had no idea what was wrong when I finally did lose my mind and pitched a stomping, screaming fit.

So go ahead. Pull the pin on my grenade. At least I won’t have to clean up the mess.

Something magic this way comes…

Wicked ³, Book 1

Callie has always known the Abbotts were different. Witches, though they call themselves “Magians”. They are her second family. Harrison Abbott has been her best friend since they were children. Tucker Abbott, her life-long crush. And their brother, Tyghe? A magical pain in her backside.

When the Abbotts need her human perspective to solve a mystery, she doesn’t hesitate. Especially since it means getting everything she ever wanted. A chance to be one of them, to have magic, even if it’s only temporary.

Someone is attacking young women at Triune, a ritual that helps Magians find their perfect threesome—the match that will complete their magic and their hearts. Callie expected to be dazzled by her first glimpse into the Magian world, but the bone-melting desire between her and the Abbott brothers isn’t part of the plan.

Nor is the decades-old secret that makes her the target of a killer…

Warning: Explicit sex, magical dresses, mind-reading rooms and mind-boggling threesomes.

BUY HERE!

The Steampunk Workshop starts today at Romance Divas!!

SO EXCITED!!!

Obviously, I have screwed up somewhere.

My son pitched a fit this morning — in his quiet, “I’m mad at you but I’m just going to sit here with red eyes and think miserable thoughts at you” kind of way — because I didn’t have the right kind of cereal in the house.

Now, I think he just woke up cranky and if it hadn’t been cereal, it would have been something else.

But dang. We weren’t OUT of cereal, we just didn’t have anything neon-colored.

So I’m torn between feeling like a bad mom because I don’t have the right kind of cereal or going all militant-vegan-sugarless on his scrawny little behind. Probably something in between is the right answer.

Had a 3 1/2 day weekend. Man, those kill me! It’s like my Saturday/Sunday slothfulness starts taking over the rest of the week and I end up getting really behind.

I’ve been difficult to please lately with my reading. I’ve picked up a little bit of Steampunk — 2 YA/straight Steampunk and 1 Steampunk Romance, plus I’ve flipped through a couple of others with this marketing gimmick, so I’m by no means well-read in this area — but I have to say that the cross-over stuff isn’t doing it for me.

Repeat after me: Steampunk is not set dressing. It’s in the world-building. It’s intrinsic. It moves the story, the plot and the characters. If it’s used only as set dressing, then the book is a historical paranormal, NOT Steampunk.

I was talking it over with some friends at my last RWA chapter meeting and one is very firmly of the opinion that Steampunk Romance is a rapidly passing fad, rather than a cross-over genre with staying power.

I can’t tell yet. I CAN tell you that if the current crop of what passes for SPR is what’s on offer, then she’ll be right.

So where does that leave me? I’m not even working on mine right now. I’m trying to finish up either the Victorian historical (sorry, no Steampunk in that one) or the Gorgon para-rom-com. With my luck, by the time I actually finish the Steampunk, no one will touch it!

In any case, don’t forget that the Steampunk Workshop at Romance Divas is starting this week. I’m looking forward to some interesting discussions on what it takes for a story to be truly Steampunk.

Like everyone else, seeing the photos of the devastation in Haiti has moved me to tears, but more than that, it’s moved me to help. I found a venue for aid that I’d never heard of before through Linnea Sinclair’s Yahoo group.

Bonnie Vanak’s real job is as an aide worker with Food For The Poor in Haiti and other third world countries in our hemisphere.

You can see some of Bonnie’s aide work here: My Travels.

From Bonnie via the group:

We can donate to her organization at http://www.foodforthepoor.org

This is the donation page for donations on the web.

Tell them to just put “Haiti earthquake” in the comments page and the donation will be earmarked for that purpose.

ALSO:

Musician Wyclef Jean set up a site to support Haiti back in 2005. They are collecting $$, and every cent goes to the relief. You can text “yele” to 501501 to donate $5 to the Yéle Haiti Earthquake Fund (it charges on your cell phone bill).

For more info and to donate more $$, you can visit here: http://www.yele.org

She is clean.

My house, she gleameth.

My Regency Valentine’s freebie, she is done.

So…now what? I’ve been inching forward on the Victorian and fiddling about with the Gorgon. Absolute opposites, but it’s good for my brain.

Why did I sign up to help my 3rd grader’s teacher with Book Adventure?!?

Why is it so freaking difficult to keep track of all the stuff the kids read? Points here, points there, points for this, points for that. Then, when I’m ready to write everything down? I discover that all of the work I just did is on another sheet of paper already, but, oops, don’t forget to add these extra points?!?!?

AAAAARRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!

My kid doesn’t even DO Book Adventure! He can’t be bothered to deal with all the freaking quizzes and you know what? I don’t care! I know he’s reading, and he’s reading WAY above grade level!

When did something so simple become so gimmicky?!